Mi vivo es "synonymous" a el verbo drama! ちがいます！いいえ＆WRONG.NO!
For the first time in my life, nothing emotional is bothering me. I GUESS because I wake up at abnormal hours to go to work then when I'm finally done with work I'm completely fatigued on the most fatigued level. 40 hrs of work, 15-20hrs spent going to work and back home, <5 hours of sleep each night, minegrains and sweat.
Can I say am completely happy with this life? To a great extent, because I realized, this is the real world and I have to do it or I'll be completely broke and maybe even depressed spending countless hours in front of the computer waiting for a friend to call me with plans who never calls. Constant working gives me some sense of stability knowing that I'm doing something with the life. I have built up this perception that you can rely more on a job than on your friends unfortunately.
I hope this reads as logical and I thought it out. I use my job as a safety from being hurt. I know since I have a job, no one would call me and because of that, I understand why people wouldn't call me because they know and even when I wouldn't get a call I would suspect that they know that I'm busy. Yes, I know I'm pathetic. Thats why i know I can rely more on a job than on friends.
I kind of lost hope in much of my friends, we are all busy. There's no initiatives, I've tried with certain people, but nothing can be forced. I can honestly say because of this job I'm happy. I'm finally happy with life, this job keeps me busy from thinking about things.
Last week, when I was on the bus going home from work, I said "I miss my friends". I absolutely do. I miss all of them. I wish I could make plans with all of them before I'm off.
This is preferably for Kevin and Jess, Blogger Users, since no one else will read it.
P.S. I love my iPhone 3G and Brooklyn!
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
5 comments:
back to blogspot... lol
don't be so hard on yourself. i'm happy for you that you were able to find a job this summer. it definitely helps when it comes to keeping your mind off of things. i hope you get to see all of your friends before leaving for syracuse.
wuv you wookieman
im going to leave to a couple of comments because since when i was writing them in one it seemed mad emo to change from one topic to another
Work must be really hectic for you, traveling back and forth, dealing with problem children, but look on the bright side, at least its not annoying customers and the hours are reasonable and not spontaneous random hours.
I honestly know who you feel when you wait for your friends to call you. Jobs suck because you gotta work thus hindering time with friends. When they call to hang out and your working or they just dont call cuz they assume ur working. But still, the few moments u get to spend with them u'll cherish.
Just take initiative and plan something like 2 weeks ahead or something for a big gathering, that way it ll be further to plan ur schedule ahead and every1 can come.
P.S Try to enjoy ur senior summer
OK i probably don't say this enough Lookman but thanks for being there for me, we've gone a long way in the past year, i only regret that i didn't take the time to get to know you better before. I remember the oldest memories of you is playing halo or yugioh..hahaha You've always been there thick and thin. You always give me great advice even though I might not show my appreciation, I still take it very seriously and thank you for it.
You are definitely right about chilling before you go off to college in your adventure towards independence.
I don't know why, but it feels like I'm saying goodbye which I shouldn't cause I know you'll come visit and everything.
Well I guess I'll see you when I see you.
P.S Did i write in your yearbook, if not, this will suffice i guess lol
Post a Comment